Reconnect Before the Next Step

A concept I’ve been thinking about a lot lately: reconnecting before the next step in my life. It’s really almost here; I’m six weeks from graduating college.

These next few weeks are a season of lasts; the last weeks of living in a high rise with a view of the Willis Tower in downtown Chicago, with the Rachel to my Monica, and of walking or riding the L to work. The final weeks I’ll be at Columbia, surrounded by a community of writers I so admire who have helped build and challenge my work, and the final weeks I’ll be copy chief at Illinois’ #1 non-daily collegiate newspaper. I’ll miss the chaos of the city and the paper and the best friends I’ve made.

But I’m moving to a different city in my home state, and I’m so excited to explore, immerse myself in it, and join the writing community there. I’ll be living with JT–waking up with my best friend, having regular date nights, making dinner with the guy I love instead of FaceTiming him, all the small things I’m so looking forward to.

And so it’s a lot of sadness muddled with excitement and nerves to process in such a short amount of time, even though it feels like everything is coming together. My solution? Checking back in with what’s important to me right now so I don’t get lost in the time that’s flying by.

In other words, reconnecting with myself; If I don’t carve out time to reflect and process everything I just mentioned, this season may also include a lot of breakdowns. Honestly, it may either way (change is always hard for me), but I think it’s still important to care for myself in the best ways I can. So, I’m going to yoga with a friend on Wednesdays again. I’m making more time to journal and focus on writing. I’m embracing girl’s days with my friends because sometimes you just need a day to binge the “Twilight” movies and check in with each other.

Which brings me to my second priority: reconnecting with friends. Specifically, my female friends who have been evolving the ways I think about the world and myself for the better. They love me and make me feel empowered and remind me how important it is to make sure they feel the same. I’m fortunate to have awesome women in my life every day and to have friends I’ve made in the last year that I also want to spend more time with before I’m a little farther away.

Reconnecting with home; I mean this on several levels. First, home has had three separate meanings for four years, and it’s about to take on a new one. I can’t fully grasp that right now, not before it’s taken shape, but it’s definitely something I’m thinking of and trying to cope ahead about.

Second, being okay with stasis. It’s spring break season right now and all of our social media feeds are full of tropical vacation pics. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t bummed I didn’t go to Southern California or to AWP or just somewhere for an actual vacation. But there is beauty in being stationary, in being grateful for the home you’re comfortable in and lucky to have and people who make it so. Last year, I was so, so fortunate to go to Europe and to California and to Alabama, trips that I needed for different reasons and that taught me to think of home (and a lot of other things) in new perspectives. This spring, I picked up a few extra work shifts and then headed home, out of the city, to spend time with my family, my childhood bff, and JT.

I’ve said it time and again, but sometimes what you need is so understated; walking through HomeGoods with your grandma; eating froyo in the park with the best friend you’ve had since second grade; waking up to see the light perfectly illuminate the periwinkle walls of your childhood room. Sometimes, what you need is rest, and when you can’t get a huge quantity of that, you have to hold tight to the simple things that make you feel better.

That’s the plan for what’s left of Spring 2019 and beyond.

Spring Break 2017 in San Diego

It was about eight weeks ago, but I’m still not over my most recent cross-country trip! For spring break, I flew with my roommate, Lindsay, to her home in San Diego. I had such a great time and took way too many pictures, so I thought I would share a travel log of our daily adventures in SoCal with some of my photos.

day 1

Day 1 – We had an evening flight into San Diego, so our first full day started after we caught up on our sleep. The first thing we did Friday morning (St. Patrick’s Day) was get our nails done. Then, Lindsay and I followed her dad to their weekend house in Palm Springs. I spent about three hours in the car jamming with her and taking in the desert and mountains. The views everywhere of dusty expanses rising to green mountains were unreal; I felt like I was in a movie. I couldn’t stop snapping pictures out of the car window.

Day 2 – After meeting more of Lindsay’s family in Palm Springs Friday afternoon, we made plans to go to College of the Desert Saturday. Basically, there is a really cool flea market held on College of the Desert’s campus. Lindsay and I scored some cute stuff, including intricate silver friendship bracelets.

day 3

day 3 2

Day 3 – Sunday was a kind of lazy day. Lindsay’s parents treated us to an excellent brunch by the pool. We spent most of the day floating in the water or soaking in sun rays from chairs on the patio. The views continued to be amazing; you can see Big Bear from their yard.

day 4

Day 4 – Lindsay took me shopping at the outlets in Cabazon. There were so many stores; we were there a few hours and only made it through one section of them. Afterwards, I had In-N-Out for the first time – it is so good! And God bless California for being so conscious of different diets – I didn’t have to worry about feeling weird for asking for no bun, it’s an option on their menu. Before we headed home, she drove me through Palm Springs and we walked through a few smaller boutiques and, as you can see, took photos in front of the Palm Springs sign.

day 5

Day 5 –  Tuesday, we drove back to SD, on winding roads cut through mountains. Before we made it out of the desert, we stopped to see these touristy dinosaurs; I’m not really sure what their purpose is? Anyway, as we drove, I was busy taking pictures again when I was supposed to be in control of our music. I was fascinated when we drove past a California dairy farm; it was so weird to see cows on such flatland and without weather-paint-peeled, red barns for shelter.

day 6.jpg

Day 6 – Wednesday was another very chill day. Lindsay got her hair done, I feverishly wrote an essay I’d been working on, and then we found another place for photo ops. I look dorkishly happy, and that is mostly because of sunshine.

Day 7  – Lindsay took me to Pacific beach, then Coronado, and then we went to Balboa Park. Thursday was packed with so much summer beauty, I can’t believe people get to live with such rich flower and water scenery all year round.

Day 8 – We were so active! We went hiking to Razor Point, which is the only mountain hiking I’ve done in the US (the only other mountain I’ve hiked was in Germany) and the view was more than worth it. Next, we trekked the stone sidewalks in windy, hilly, La Jolla so that I could see a beach with actual seals! They were so unbothered by all the people taking their photos, and I swear some of them were posing. La Jolla’s ocean side cliffs were my favorite sight of the trip. The flowers on the path were so vibrant, wrapping around the white fencing that served as a guard rail on the path. They beautifully fringed the bottom of my pictures of steady teal waves washing into the arc of sand and stone. There were benches along the path, and I could easily imagine myself coming to sit there and stare at the water on a regular basis. 

Day 9 – On our last full day in California, Lindsay’s parents took us to the San Diego Zoo’s Safari Park. It was probably the best zoo experience I’ve ever had. We took a bus ride through the sanctuary part, and it was so cool to see all the animals with a lot of space, just kind of relaxing in their groups. I also got to see that little three banded armadillo, Tattoo, up close, and he was super cute. 

Oh, and that evening, our last in SD, we went to a ship launch. Talk about cool, probably once-in-a-lifetime, experiences. We got to sit on the platform even, and listen to the company’s president and a local representative speak, and have the Marine Corp band right behind us. There were also killer cupcakes to eat and fireworks after the ship was in the water.

All in all, spring break in San Diego was a lot of fun. I want to thank Lindsay and her parents for letting me stay with them and showing me all these cool, beautiful, warm, west-coast things I had never gotten to experience before. I think I kind of fell in love with Southern California, and it will definitely not be my last trip there.